Tag Archives: University of Alabama

The Tide Outside

Note: Please understand that the images depicted in this blog of redneck Alabama fans are only of those who are on the outer fringe, over the top, houndstooth clad, bandwagon followers; not the truly dedicated, highly intelligent fan base who visited with me at the Barn today. Please read this for the humor we all saw today! The point I am trying to make is this isn’t all Alabama fans, heck I married an Alabama Alumnus!

Today, while I was at the Barn, there was definitely more craziness out in the pasture than inside the corral. Walking through the parking lot I saw dozens and dozens of Crimson Tide fans. They were making their way into the mall to stand in line for an autograph by Mount Cody! For those who don’t live in Alabama or don’t know anything about college football in the south, Mount Cody’s real name is Terrence Cody, number 62 on the BCS Title winning University of Alabama at Tuscaloosa football team.  He helped the Tide beat Lame Kiffin’s Vols in October to keep his team undefeated.

So he was there signing autographs. I have never felt like I worked in a real Barn until today. Other than the county fair, I didn’t know there could be more mullets, rat tails, and bearded women in one location. I have waited in line at a Jack Daniel’s bottle signings for a few hours in my time. The difference is I get to met people from all over the United States. Today, it was really just a family reunion. Most everyone there were cousins! Ok, maybe that is an exaggeration, because there were a few baby strollers in the crowd. To my knowledge Alabama hasn’t legalized marrying your cousin just yet.

The first person in line arrived at three in the morning. He was there with iPod and his encyclopedia of Alabama football lore. He had plenty to keep him busy. When I arrived at 11:30 am, the line stretched to the escalators near Belk’s. When I went on break at 2:30 pm, the line was at the Cookie Company near Dillard’s. The line went from the escalator at Dillard’s to Belk’s wrapping around to the DMV and then back to Dillard’s and down that hallway.  At three o’clock in the afternoon they cut the line in half by telling everyone who hadn’t made it to Gymboree to go home – bye-bye, go home! When I left the Barn at 7 pm the last person in line had been waiting since 2:15 pm. She just so happened to be one of my favorite Christmas shoppers at the Barn!

Wow, all of this for a college football player. A senior consumer science major who blocked two field goal attempts against Tennessee. Not Mark Ingram, the Heisman trophy winner. Not the Pope or even the President of the United States of America. All these fanatical Alabama fans were standing in line for six to eight hours for Mount Cody to write his name on a photo, helmet, or football. Heck, he probably wrote more today than he has ever taken notes in class. He is just a guy, not the Lord All Mighty. True the crowd didn’t number five thousand and Sbarro’s was still open, so we didn’t need a miracle. However, he couldn’t perform one even if we did need some food. It was just a crazy day at the mall!

To top all the craziness on the outside we had all our favorite loons visit inside the Barn! Cameron Drape had to pay a visit to purchase things that she will return next Thursday. I don’t care how much she loves the bird plates. Once she gets those precious birds home she will want to visit us again. Cameron’s crazy red-headed kindred spirit walked in proclaiming she “wasn’t one of those D*&% Alabama Fans” I knew this would be an eventful transaction. She wanted something like vase fillers, but not fruit or candles. She wanted something that she wouldn’t knock over. I was left to think she was a blousy drunk; someone that Josh Groban would like. If you don’t get that comment, please start watching Glee, Golden Globe winning Glee. She didn’t want to give me her address, because she lives in a cardboard box.

To top it all off my table cloth lady finally returned! Well she didn’t, but her really confused husband with her receipt and minus the debit card stood steadfast cursing all Alabama fans and proclaiming War D&^% Eagle! It was a calamity! He wanted to return the table cloth that I had sold in early December after an hour of deliberation. Is it too large, it is the correct color, or will my daughter like this table cloth? Magnolia Garland was helping Mr. Auburn. He didn’t really comprehend what we were saying. He felt that we wanted to just say no to his return. This blog has gone too long, but trust me when I say it was a wild day inside and outside of the Barn.

I was thankful to work today and enjoy the carnival like atmosphere with my Barnyard friends! Manhattan, Magnolia, and all the others! The fun of working the Barn is 1 part customers, 1 part product and 1,000 parts associates! Manhattan said it best when we all had headaches from the ruckus outside, we had seen someone try to sell his place in line for $70, and all of our most special guests visited. “I am glad I could share this day with you!” This is true; if Hudson had been working we would have had to call HEMSI after his brain hemorrhaged. God bless the Barn!

Uphill Both Ways

Remember hearing your parents tell stories about walking barefoot to school in the snow uphill both ways? Today the adventure home seemed as treacherous as all those stories my folks told me. The snow on the roads, the crazy southern drivers, and the dumb Alabama fan waving her car flag down the icy mountain made for a true bonding experience for Chris and me. It was two hours in the TEV for a life time memory. Let me share a few stories.

This morning I forgot my phone at home. Of all days to leave my phone at home, today would not be the best day. First, my Be Ready Camp knowledge kicked in telling me this is unsafe driving in winter precipitation without a way to call for help. On top of that, Kim Dickerson got engaged last night and I didn’t get the phone call because I was left without the “Carhart”. Congrats Kim! Remember to make Alex muffins every now and then.

Chris sent me text messages throughout the morning keeping me up to date on all the road closings. Boo at home with my phone was very prepared. After a few phone calls and oh crap the southern sky is falling, Chris and I decided to leave work and head for Creekstone.  We rallied in the Space Camp parking lot. Joining forces to drive home we drove toward Governors drive. We saw lots a crazies weaving and speeding through traffic. There was a guy who had been in his truck too long and pulled off to pee. Yes, he had to pee.

We saw a dozen or so Huntsville PD zipping up and down the mountain on the opposing lane, but we were stuck behind a Ford pick up truck. There was a HEMSI unit behind us. I looked for Kendall and Ric, but I think it was another crew in the truck. I had all my survival gear in my backpack just incase we had to camp in the frozen wilderness of Hampton Cove. I had snacks, a flashlight, emergency blanket, and matches. Wait, I sound like Divot and Snapper on their drive to my house. They typically have to stop for a nap.

The craziest thing we saw was a Crimson clad car with an extremely stupid driver talking on her cell phone and waving her Alabama window flag out of her sun roof. Really? Please, do you want to die? Note: this wasn’t just when she was sitting still in traffic, but it was on the icy down slope of Highway 431. I thought to myself that this lady will not get to see Alabama’s 13th national title if she slides off the mountain because of her stupidity.

“It is all about the adventure” is my motto! Chris was being the geek that he is, following the traffic reports on Twitter as we crept up the mountain. I didn’t have my phone, so I was focused wholly on driving. Glad I paid attention to my Arizona online driving school! With all the stress driving home and having to send people home from work, my conclusion is, “This is how a snow day feels as an adult!”

Twelve and Holding

Tonight when the University of Alabama takes to the field in the Rose Bowl they will be competing to win their 13th national title. Being declared best in the nation is based on nothing more than mathematical polls and human interest. Does this mean they are the best team in the land? Just like crowing a Miss America it is all in the eyes of the judges.

I believe that the BCS system of crowning a national champion is just like crowning a beauty queen. There is no true competition where one team is left standing as the best. There isn’t one victorious team that reigns on top of the hill after a tournament or “series” of contests. Why is it that the most lucrative college sport doesn’t have a completive method of crowning its king? The answer is MONEY!

Long ago a bunch of good ole boys decided to create bowls or regional beauty pageants for their favorite football teams to compete. Unfortunately, unlike Miss America, the winners of these pageants don’t face off in a final contest. There are several teams left claiming they are the most best and most beautiful.

The NCAA has a competition and gives a trophy to national champions in all sports with the exception of the highest level of college football. There is no comparison to the passion shown on the courts and fields of battle leading up to the Final Four or Omaha! In Division 1-AA, Bowl Subdivision, B*&% S*@$ football we are left trying to making everyone happy except the fans and alumni of the colleges they support. The fans are left crying for some type of play-off rather than just #1 versus #2.

Everyone will watch the game tonight and enjoy the commentary. If you are a Texas or Alabama fan you will find some contentment in this arrangement. But there are several other teams that could rival these teams if given a chance to compete in a tournament. I must agree with everyone other than the BCS executives; let’s have a play-off in all NCAA sports. Mr. and Mrs. BCS, you will make more money and you will make millions of fans happy.

So, until that day, Hook ‘em Tide!!! You may question my combination of words, but until there is a series of contests that looking more like a play off, we are left with a bi-curious competition similar to Miss America!