Digital ramblings without my Dixon Ticonderoga...

Why No Post?

I haven’t been blogging recently; maybe I am just blocking the whole output of emotional or creative flow. My life has changed so much in the last three weeks. I have learned the one thing that can make Red Bull cry. I have started grad school. I have visited family and friends. And, I have limited my time at the Barn. I write a lot about my personal life, dreams, and feelings and I guess I have avoided that by not blogging. (WOW, I have been watching too much Glee! Drama isn’t my strong suit.)

We lost my brother, Will, in 1985. He was my best friend. True, he was my brother and that is not always the case with siblings, but Will was a special little kid. In 1992, I ventured to Camp Garawya in Clinton, Mississippi for an Acteen’s weekend. God did one of those “God things” in my life that weekend. He showed me a tiny, little part of his plan for my life. That part was sticky, hot and humid summer camp! More over, I saw the over arching theme of working with kids in my future.

Before then, I had shallow dreams of being an astronaut or maybe an architect. In 1994, I decided at Camp of the Rising Son that I would be an educator, for two reasons, the first being summers off. The second and most important reason, I get to work with kids. I don’t know why I have a gift with kids, but I do! Being a teacher at St. Paul and Discovery Middle was awesome; I got to see how kids matured over 10 months not just a week. I got to try new ways to present materials. At Delta State, I had a college professor tell me I would never make a good teacher because I have issues with spelling and writing. My message to her is, sit on a tack or in her case a rake.

I learned it really doesn’t matter if you can spell if you want to inspire people to grow and learn. Teach kids to dream big dreams. That has been my motto for a while. Working at the Barn has allowed me to work with kids at times, heck Cameron Drape and her Turkey Plates exercised my mad ninja kid skills once or twice. Leaving the Barn tonight, Manhattan Chair pointed out something that is important for me to remember. Kids are important to me. I love teaching and inspiring kids to mature and discover the world around them.

Why do you think that is? I go back to my best buddy, little Will. He loved learning; he wanted to be everything from a cowboy to a cook, from a doctor to a dozer driver. I love working with kids, because it reminds me of my little brother. He is my inspiration. It isn’t about working at a camp or in a classroom. So tonight when I started saying goodbye to the Barn, I was also saying good bye to something else. Working with kids is important to who I am. Yes, I am bigger and deeper than this blog could ever describe, but this is my inspiration. I have struggled for a few weeks on how to express this feeling in my heart, but now I found the right words.